Memoirs of a Fat Girl
by duhastMichZwielicht
Summary: Hello. My name is Bella Swan, and I am fat. Ther'es no sugar coating, no getting around it. Plain and simple. I've accepted it.  Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**Memoirs of a Fat Girl**

**As of now this is a one shot to hold this story in my mind. If more is requested, more you shall get. I am completely dedicated to this story. I wasn't even going to post it, but I decided, "What harm could it do?"**

**I do not own Twilight, the plot or any characters of Twilight.**

Hello. My name is Bella Swan, and I am fat. Ther'es no sugar coating, no getting around it. Plain and simple. I've accepted it.

**PROLOUGE**

**August 3rd, 2010**

Bella sat in her room with her shirt up her tummy was shiny and white as a vampire's ass. She felt her slightly raised stretch marks. They've faded into a light pinkish-brown. She looked over to her tiny dog and poked at her stomach again. She had her laptop open as she typed, multitasking. Bella was listening to 105.9 KHQ. Pop. She didn't know why she listened to it. Perhaps to make fun? The songs were jokes. As if to prove her point, 'Naturally' by Selena Gomez came on. Disney thought every so called "star" they produced could sing. As if.

Bella whacked away at her story. Her inspirement came easily, for the first few minutes, anyway. She layed back and looked at her posters. Ashley, Taylor, various bands. Her eyes came to her yellow butterflies. They had green hearts on them.

You see, Bella had a job. She worked at a daycare. 10 or more kids in and out every day. She had made the butterflies as a craft example. They were just simple foam. Later that night, though, in pretty pink foam letters, she'd glued two words. One for each butterfly.

Bella held a lot of resentment in her 13 year old heart. Everybody cooed about how mature and grown up she was. Bella did not want to grow up as fast as she did. Her mother had run the daycare straight out of their home. Her little brother was a colic. Her older brother never fell asleep sober. Her dad never did things he should have. Chasing after the perfect life, Bella grew tired.

Isabella Swan was not what you'd call thin. Or short. Or petite. Anything that referred to the longed after tininess. The tininess she was sure would make her feel pretty. Feminine. Loved. Bella was at a height of 5'9", a height she added to her resentment. She weighed a whopping amount of 252 pounds. Though a good bit of it was pure muscle, no one saw that. They saw the layer of fat that covered the muscle. They saw her size 20 pant size.

She gently pulled the hem of her shorts up. Her thighs were huge. She was the most insecure about her thighs, not only for the reason you'd think, either. She traced the scars on her legs. It seemed like an eternity ago that she had made them. There were more than a dozen on each leg. Long and faded to a deep brown, she thought about when she'd made herself quit.

Bella had told her friend. The one she thought she could trust with anything. Sure, she had friends closer to her than Taylor. She loved them to death, but if she had told them, it would have been around school faster than she could have said the words. She had a couple of people wondering, of course. But they saw her wrists, pure and unscarred. Bella wasn't so stupid as to put them in such an obvious, visible place.

Sometimes she toyed with the idea of doing it again. She knew where the glass was. she didn't make a move for them, though. Instead, Bella traced the scars again. On any other person, they would have long since faded. But not her. She had such an unbeleivably slow healing time, it wasn't even funny.

Bella leaned back and stretched. Sitting in such a position as she, the cramps had begun. She thought about her mother, who she made the strangest group with, whom she had inherited personality and compassion from. Her mother was average. Average height at 5'4". Average weight. Average size(8). She envied her mother.

She thought of how pathetic it was for a 13 year old girl to rather have the body of a 44 year old who'd had 3 kids to her own.

Once again, Bella eyes wandered her room. Again, her eyes fell upon her yellow butterflies. This time she stared at the little pink words that read her hostility to the world so well. Framed by different shades of green hearts. Placed on a backdrop bright, sunshiney yellow, so oppposing to the two simple words that litte foam peices held. There, tacked to her wall were the little word that held so much feeling.

"_Fuck You"_

**So, what do you think? Worth continuing? This was a prolouge of sorts, I suppose. If I do contines, the next chapters will be in a POV other than third person.**

**Based on a true story. Some rights reserved.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own the plot, characters, setting, or anything in Twilight.**

**August 4th, 2010**

Bella woke up to the sounds of yells, crashes, and barks. As always, daycare was in full swing by only 8:30. She whipped off her shirt and threw on a dark blue tank top. It looked nice with her pale skin, though her flabby arms were in full veiw. She also pulled on a gauzy tan skirt with blue and purple swirls. It was loose, she noticed. Though she had bought it loose, she still liked the feeling. It wasn't often she got the novelty of loose things.

Isabella went to the bathroom and twisted in front of the mirror. She had a hefty figure. Wide chest. Small_er _waist, though still not small enough for the world. Her hips flared out, wider than the rest of her. Thankfully, her thick thighs were hidden by the long skirt, Bella pulled her hair into a high ponytail and decided she looked good enough.

She walked into the kitchen. Only two kids were still eating.  
"Hello, Sam. Hello, Paul," She said to the two and three year olds muching on breakfast.

"Hi, Bella," They chimed back, mouths still stuffed with food.

"Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Ok."

Bella rolled her eyes. They were so impressionable. She turned aroud and grabbed a box of cereal. Cinnamon Toast Crunch. She grabbed a bowl and poured some in. Bella then walked over to the fridge and poured some milk into the ceral, then continued her way to the couch.

"Bella, clean out the cat box," Her mother told her. She was playing some stupid internet game.

"Right now?" Bella mumbled with a mouth full of food.

"Yes!"

Bella sighed and hefted herself up. There was a Bella butt shaped dent on the couch. She wnt and lifted the litter box. Her cute little white and tiger spotted kitten was watching her with wide eyes. They had the cat area, which held two food bowl, self pouring water dish, sleeping post, bag of food, and, of course, the litter box, fenced off to the daycare children and other pets.

She quickly cleaned it out and returned it. Bella stopped to pet her cat and heard the cries of a toddler. She had a toy taken away from her. For the second time, Bella rolled her eyes. She liked kids, but they were so dramatic.

This time, when Bella sat down, she draped a blanket across her stomach, hoping to hide it.

"Where's your puppy, Jake?" She asked her little brother.-

"Outside."

"You should bring her in. It's getting hot."

"She's fine."

"Jacob Tyer, it is 75 degrees out right now. Has she even eaten today?"

Instead of answering her, he simply got up and went to the back door. Bella smiled. SHe could hear his coos.

"Come on pupppy! Ladybiiird!" Jake called out.

Ladybird. Bella thought that was so dumb. Her older brother Jared told him she should name her that. Jake idolized Jared. Anything he did, Jacob wanted to do too. It was strange though, with nine years between the two. Bella was right in the middle of the two.

"Bella?" a six year old asked.

"Yes?"

"Can I play with my dinosaurs?"

"Have at it."

She thought. Her life was so boring. The same things everyday.

"Mom?"

"What?"

"I'm going to the pool."

"Whatever."

Bella sighed. Sometimes she felt like her mom didn't care. Was it because she was fat? Because she held no resemblence to her mother? Who knew?

* * *

Bella had been at the pool for about a half an hour. It was the only place she let herself go in a bathing suit. The pool was at her grandma's house, about a quarter mile down the road from hers. Five of her cousins were there. They were some of the only children she could stand.

Lily, the oldest, always got in trouble. Sure she started some things, but not all. Zane was 7. He was the only boy, allergic to wheat and corn, and he did no wrong. To be honest, Bella saw a lot of things caused by him. Norah, who was only 5, was a princess with lots of attitude. Zeeva, Bella's secret favorite, was a sweetie pie all around. She loved Bella to death. Lucy, the youngest, was a brat. She was weel on the way to being a clone of her brother.

Bella floated on her back. She thought about her Aunt Jane, who would be arriving from Germany late tomorrow evening. It made Bella very excited. Her husband was a dick, though, Bella thought randomly.

**Longish chapter? I couldn't really find a place to end it. Links on my profile.**


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